<\/a><\/p>\n

I just came across an old post from my previous blog at Live Journal (link<\/a>). For some reason I felt like re-posting it here:<\/p>\n

Today, November 30th, 2004, I have been abducted by aliens.
\nI can’t give a full, detailed, account, since I’m only faintly aware of the actual abduction.
\nNo, I didn’t dream it. It really happened. I remember laying on a gurney in a dimly lit chamber.
\nSoft strange music playing in the background. I also recall laying on my side, staring at an unfamiliar and complicated looking aparatus which was connected to a long black shiny rubbery hose.
\nI instinctively knew that that would have to be the infamous anal probe, and I’m frightened by the size and length of it: they are going to stick that thing WHERE?
\nSo, all those alien abduction\/anal probe stories are real after all?
\nOne of the less conscious memories is that of beings coming into the room, beings in long loose robes. Green ones I believe.
\nFrom then on I am aware only of some faint experiences of uncomfortable pressure in my abdominal area and some soft strange whirring sounds.
\nThe next thing I remember is waking up, feeling VERY dizzy and disoriented, still laying on a gurney, next to strange machinery that’s making soft puffing and bleeping noises.
\nAnd I realize that it’s all over. That I’m still alive. And will live. And that the experience, although by no means pleasant, wasn’t even painful!
\nActually, the only rather painful part of the procedure was the $250 co-payment for this colonoscopy.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

(you can click on the picture)<\/font><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I just came across an old post from my previous blog at Live Journal (link). For some reason I felt like re-posting it here: Today, November 30th, 2004, I have been abducted by aliens. I can’t give a full, detailed, account, since I’m only faintly aware of the actual abduction. No, I didn’t dream it. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-81","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-emotions","category-pointless-remarks"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/claessen.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/claessen.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/claessen.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/claessen.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/claessen.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=81"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/claessen.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/claessen.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=81"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/claessen.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=81"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/claessen.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=81"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}